Your feelings are calm. Your reflexes are fast. Your mind is clear.
You are decisive. You know what you want. You know what’s right for you.
You perform your best – public speaking, sports, music, relating to
people. Your confidence is deep. This lets
you be real.
Being present is a time frame you choose to focus on.
There are only three possible time frames – past, present and future.
Once you become aware of the thoughts you are having and the content of
those thoughts, you will notice which time frame you are in at any given
time. You will begin to notice how often your thoughts and feelings are
focused on the past or the future. These thoughts are riddled with
judgments, comparing the past or future to your present situation. Many
people spend less than 1% of their time being fully present. The rest of
the time, we drift in and out as our attention wanders. Your mind may
even seem to be out of your own control.
Your memory is strong when you are in the present.
Do you recall times that are very clear in your memory? All of you
was in the “here and now” in those moments – in a first love, on a great
vacation, with a trusted friend. These were moments when you felt safe.
You will be present more often when you learn to feel safe even in
difficult, stressful, anxious situations – when people criticize you,
when you make mistakes, when you are in a financial jam or in a love
life crisis. Otherwise, outside circumstances will dictate when you are
able to be present…or not.
Being present happens in an instant.
So does not being present. An upsetting thoughts triggers emotions
based on the past hurts or future fears. It happens in an instant and is
highly dependent on how good your boundaries are. Both result in
conflict and unhappiness rooted in past and future-based thoughts and
feelings. This is the real You that you want to keep hidden.
To be in the present is to stop comparing.
We compare the present with what “should” be happening. The result of
this is judgments. We judge situations, other people and ourselves.
Judgments make it hard to be present. Our minds become pre-occupied with
thoughts that analyze the past or role-play the future. We live in the
past to lick our wounds or we live in the future because we don’t trust
ourselves that we’ll be okay in the future.
Being present means to live in the moment. (as if you have nothing to hide, nothing to prove and nothing to lose)
This is how your mind, body, heart and soul become unified in that
one moment. Time slows down. You are connecting with what is.
Your ability to be present depends on letting go control.
Given that control is coming from the past you have to give up control to be in the present. What you resist is what you become.
Being present begins with NOTICING when you are trying to alter the present moment.
You become aware that you use “judgments” to try to control others
and yourself. This creates a ‘victim’ mindset. You learn to stop being a
victim. You become a more decisive person who makes wiser choices in
difficult, uncertain and even scary situations. Your self-confidence and
self-trust grow tremendously, as does your faith and spirituality. You
feel safer, which lets you be present with others. They will soon notice
a real and positive change!