Tuesday, January 12, 2016

Op zoek naar geluk



Leestijd: 8 minuten.




Dit artikel is geïnspireerd op Mark Manson's Stop Trying to Be Happy. Met toestemming.



 

Wie is er niet op zoek naar geluk...

Geluk, net als andere emoties, is niet iets wat je bereikt, maar eerder iets dat je bezit. Als je vanuit je razende boosheid ineens een vol glas wijn richting je partner gooit, ben je niet zelfbewust over je staat van woede. Je denkt niet bij jezelf: "Ben ik eigenlijk boos? Doe ik dit op de juiste manier?" Nee, je bent uit op oorlog. Je bezit en leeft de woede. Je bent de woede. En na een tijdje gaat het voorbij, het verdwijnt.
 
Net als een zelfverzekerde vrouw zich niet afvraagt of zij wel zelfverzekerd is, een gelukkig man zich niet afvraagt of hij wel gelukkig is. Ze zijn het gewoon.

Wat dit betekent is dat geluk niet op zichzelf bereikt kan worden, maar dat het een bijproduct is van specifieke doorlopende levenservaringen. En hier ontstaat meteen de verwarring, zeker sinds dat geluk zo vercommercialiseerd wordt om als doel op zich te bereiken. Koop dit en ben gelukkig, leer dat en je wordt nog gelukkiger.  Als je niet oplet wordt je overladen door duizenden boeken, films, tijdschriften, cursussen, workshops, blogs, vlogs en zelfs festivals. Want gelukkig zijn is toch het beste wat je kan overkomen, toch? Maar geluk kan je niet kopen en je kan het ook niet bereiken. Het is er gewoon. 


Sunday, December 27, 2015

Een toekomst creëren vanuit je verleden werkt niet!



Regelmatig functioneren mensen binnenin een paradigma dat in het verleden voor hen werkte, nu belemmerend werkt. Belemmerend om dat dit paradigma in het verleden gecreëerd is; van overtuigingen en interpretaties ontwikkeld op jonge leeftijd, zelfs kindertijd. Gebruik makend van een systeem vanuit het verleden zal jou alleen maar meer van hetzelfde geven.

Er is geen ruimte voor een heldere toekomst, zonder de bereidheid van perspectief te willen verschuiven, ofwel wat het verschuiven van jouw paradigma's betekent. Het onthullen en loslaten van patronen van denken en doen die  gedateerd of niet meer van toepassing zijn, maakt ruimte voor nieuwe frisse en innovatieve manieren van zijn en doen, en manifesteren het leven wat je werkelijk wil.

Sunday, October 11, 2015

Master Your Life






part 1.


Do not believe anything you hear in here. Even the truth when believed, is made up. You must experience the truth, not believe it. Read this essay as trying a new coat. See if it fits and when it don't, throw it away.


Living

Living is really pretty simple. Living happens right now; it doesn’t happen back then, and it doesn’t happen out there. Living is not the story of your life. Living is the process of experiencing right now.

Thinking about right now, figuring it out, perceiving it, arguing, reading about or believing anything about right now – none of these produce any certainty about living.

When you get beyond the symbols and beliefs about now, beyond thinking about it, beyond affording or working at it, when you get even beyond merely feeling it, when you get all the way up to observing it, being with it, and finally up to totally experiencing it, the uncertainty about living goes away, because you know the truth in the only way in which a being ever knows the truth – by direct experience.

Let’s take a look at the nature of now. What I’ve noticed with the people I’ve interacted with is that everyone who truly experiences right here, right now, actually sees that it’s all perfect exactly the way it is. When I am being myself, nothing more and nothing less – when I am doing exactly what I am doing – when I am allowing what is so around me to be exactly like it is – when I am being right here instead of where I am going – when I am observing it all just as it is without adding any judgments or evaluations or comparing it, then I observe that it is perfect.

The ball game might seem to be over at that point because you now would know the truth – what is, is and what is not – is not. You could just sit there and dig the experience of it and let it be the way it is and it is perfect. The problem is you’ve only handled the truth – you still have the lie to handle.

Actually, not very many of us are paying attention to living and therefore we don’t get very much out of it. There’s something else besides living, the thing most of us have our attention on.  And that’s the thing called life – the drama, the story, the illusion, the lie.


Life

Life is really a totally different thing from living. Living is just what’s happening right now, right this instant, and that’s all perfect. Perfect means what is – is, and what isn’t – isn’t, and that’s flawless.

Life is a bag full of stuff. It is composed of something that might be represented by all the departments in a university and all of the sections, specialties, and the subspecialties. And you have to go beyond that and get into things that aren’t handled in the universities – and even into church and playing poker – all of those things.

Once you have realized yourself, once you are enlightened, you still have life to handle, and life is an uncertain machine. For most people, the practice of life is a process of self-invalidation. If you go fishing and you don’t catch any fish, the next time you go fishing, it’s not as much fun – you’ve lost some enthusiasm. If you go out again and don’t catch any fish, your enthusiasm lessens and pretty soon you’d rather stay in bed.

Essentially that’s the way people are about life. They’d rather stay in bed than play life.  There are things like wars, and political scandals, and the job to go to every day, and your marriage, and the project you’re working on, and your family, and getting along with people, and being able to communicate to someone who really doesn’t want to get it, all of those things.  Each one of those things is like a fishing trip with no fish. After a while you lose your enthusiasm. Let’s take a look inside life and see if we can get some certainty about it.


Life Is Very Simple

Actually life is very simple. What keeps it from appearing to be simple, is that it comes in a lot of different forms. You get a form called a chair and a form called a body and you get a form called a rug, and a form called a railing and a microphone, and a pair of pants, and shoes, and you get speakers and curtains and that’s a whole bunch of different stuff. There are rules about chairs and bodies, and rules about rugs and about railings and microphones and shoes. You’ve got all these things to figure out and you just know you can’t handle it all. If they would only leave you alone with chairs, instead of bringing those rugs in. If they just let you do your thing, in your own little corner of the universe, everything would be fine.

The problem is, that idea only comes from going out into the universe and not getting any fish. That gives you the idea that the answer is to not fish. In fact however, the fundamental rules for chairs and the fundamental rules for everything are exactly the same. There are some central rules in life. Once you have personally uncovered those rules for yourself, life is no longer a mystery.


Life Is A Game

The most fundamental rule about life, the thing that most people overlook, is that life is a game. It annoys people to hear that life is a game, because they know that when they got up this morning it didn’t feel like a game. And besides which, war isn’t a game, and of course many things obviously are not games.

The truth is that all of life is a game. Games have various degrees of consequences and war games have very heavy consequences. The consequences of getting up in the morning and not feeling like getting up are heavy too. To have to go through life when you don’t want to do it, to have to go to work, to have to do your job, to have to be married to that person you are married to, to not be able to be married to the person that you want – all that is heavy, with big consequences. The point is you lose your ability to play the game, to master the game, when you forget that a game is a game. In order to master life, we need to recover the realization that life is truly a game.

Let’s take a look at games. If we’re going to master life we need to know of what a game is composed. You don’t have to figure out the rules for your marriage and your job and your interpersonal relationships and all the other games you play in life. If you understand the rules of the game, you will understand mastery of life.

First we have to start in a no – games – condition. The name of the no-games condition is living. You start playing a game from the position called living, where what is – is, and what isn’t, isn’t.


Rules Of The Game

To have a game you have to agree that something is more important than something else. There isn’t any such thing as a game that does not include the notion that something is better than something else. Intrinsically, or livingly, nothing’s better than anything else. But when you get out of livingness and move into life, you start with the notion that something’s important.

To create that something’s important requires agreement. For me to say that this chair is important is ridiculous. It’s simply a chair. The whole issue of importance is ridiculous, except when you agree that it’s important. The truth is that if everybody agrees that this chair is important, the chair becomes important – by agreement.

The second thing about a game is that what is to be important must be what isn't … because if what is is important the game is over. Life is a process in which, wherever you are, that isn’t it. It’s got to be someplace else. Life is a game in which what isn’t is more important or better than what is. You need to get these two things: A) that importances are created by agreement alone and that nothing is intrinsically important – things actually just are; B) that in order to have a game, where you are not or what you are not has got to be more important than where you are or what you are.

The real question is, where is the aliveness in the game? Where’s the happiness? And the love? And the health and the full self-expression? The purpose of living is living. Your total purpose of living is living. That’s the real purpose of life, but that’s not the goal in the game. The goal in the game is always to win. And that’s one of the things that helps you know where it is.


Goals In The Game

It is merely represented by the goal you set – your destination and time of reaching it. Some people think the goal is it: that if I get over here and I’m not over there anymore that I’ve reached it, because being over here was my goal. Actually, the goal is simply what you set up to represent it. That isn’t it, that’s just a representation, it’s the way you get to play the game. The representation is anything you agree on to represent it.

Suppose you agreed that what you wanted to be was a fireman. Then it is represented by being a fireman. Now suppose you are halfway to this goal and you say, "You know something, I don’t think I want to be a fireman. I think I’ll be a policeman." And then you say, "No, I don’t think I’ll be a policeman, I think I’ll be a chemist." At each moment, at each step, you have the opportunity to experience living. You have the opportunity to realize the purpose (not the goal) of the game which is livingness.

To master life you simply need to know what you want. There’s nothing you should want. Whatever you want is fine. There’s no intrinsically valuable importance. You don’t have to find it. It’s whatever you say it is. Wake up in the morning and make up a goal. It doesn’t make any difference. Most of you are stuck with what you say you wanted. It’s all right not to want what you wanted. You can want something new now.



Mastering Life

All you have to do is know where it is you want to go. It doesn’t hurt to know where you are as well. Mastering life is a process of moving from where you are to where you want to be.

Let’s summarize and see how simple this is:

Life is a game.
A game includes the notion of importances.
For something to be important, you have to agree that it’s important.

Life involves the notion of importances. Importances are created by agreement or disagreement, and, in order to have a game, what’s important has got to be what isn’t, and in order to master life, all you have to do is to say what you want. The only complications are things that wither move you towards it, things which interfere with it or things which oppose it; forces or flows which are either moving with you, opposing you, or crossing you.



To be continued

Saturday, June 20, 2015

BEYOND

Be like a Sadhu and see yourself as the sun. He's a friend of the whole world. He doesn't say "I am your enemy, I cannot come to your house." Even though you are an enemy, you are a friend. He comes to everyone. Just like that - we should also be. Showing brightness to everyone. So we have to think that we are all one - and be happy.

“BEYOND” is an exclusive documentary featuring photographer Joey L. Set in Varanasi, India. The documentary by filmmaker Cale Glendening follows Joey and his assistant Ryan as they complete their latest photo series- “Holy Men.”